DGM Demigod Messenger
by BelieveInMeTonight
Summary: What do you get when you mix a chat room, demi-gods, and gods? Answer: Chaos. Little Mermaid underpants, Finding Nemo pajamas, Spy Thalia, and Athena with a frying pan. Chaos.
1. Chapter 1

D.G.M. (Dem-god messaging)

Summery: What do you get when you mix a chat room, demi-gods, and gods?

Answer: Chaos. Little Mermaid underpants, Finding Nemo Pajamas, Spy Thalia and Athena with a frying pan. Chaos.

AN: I have no idea where this idea came from but it just exploded. Some chapters have gods and some don't. Some have demi-gods and some don't. So far it doesn't have any of the Lost Hero characters, but I'm still writing. I know it's been done before, but I'm gonna give it a shot. Most of the chapters are really short. But as of today, (May 3) I have about 8 written.  
>Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson. or the CIA or the FBI.<p>

SB (Seaweed Brain) Percy

WG: (Wise Girl) Annabeth

PF (Pine cone Face): Thalia

D: Nico

SB is online.

WG is online.

PF is online.

D is online.

SB: Heeeyyyyy!

PF: Shut up, Perce.

D: Amen!

SB: Hey! Annabeth!

D: Geez! Can't stand up for yourself? Always run to Annie?

WG: Don't call me Annie.

D: Eeep!

D is offline.

PF: Where he should be.

WG: Hey Thal, where are you?

PF: In a place.

WG: What place?

PF: That one. With a tree.

WG: ?

PF:* said really fast * I am not at liberty to say at this time. Your call is very important to us. Please leave a message. We will get back to you.

PF is offline.

WG: ?

SB: Sounds like FBI to me.

WG: More like CIA. I have to go.

SB: Love you.

WG: Love you, too.

D is online.

D: GET A ROOM!

D is offline.

SB: Well then.

SB is offline.

WG is offline.

End

Believe In Me Tonight


	2. Chapter 2

D.G.M. (Demi-god Messenger)

New Characters:

S1: Conner

S2: Travis

I3Plants: Grover

OceanRox: Poseidon

NoItAll: Athena

Fred: Apollo

Wine Dude: Mr. D

plus the characters from chapter 1.

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson. Nor do I own the line "Holy Hera!" That's from Disney's Hercules. (Love that movie :) ) or the Geico commercial.

2

Everyone is online.

SB: Helllllllloooooo? Is anyone here? Hello?

SB: I 3 Annabeth! I wear Little Mermaid underwear!

S1: Holy Hera!

S2: Holy Hera!

SB: AHHHH! People!

PF: Ha! Little Mermaid underpants! :D

SB: shut up...

I3Plants: Percy!

OceanRox: Why Percy? Why?

NoItAll: Come on, Poseidon. We all know you have Finding Nemo pajamas.

OceanRox: I do not!

WG: Uh, Mom. How do you know that?

NoItAll: Not my fault he was running around in them.

OceanRox: Yeah, it kinda was. You were chasing me with a frying pan!

Fred: A frying pan? Really? That's the best you could come up with?

NoItAll: * Shrugs * Take what you can get.

Wine Dude: Well this has been fun, but I have to go grow some grap- I mean strawberries.

D: Hey! It's the Wine Dude!

Wine Dude: Don't Call Me That!

D: But It's your name.

Wine Dude is offline.

D: I think I made him mad.

PF: Ya think?

S1: You better start running.

S2: I wonder what Nico flavored wine tastes like.

WG: Sour.

D is offline.

SB: So Thalia, are you a spy and/or work for the CIA/FBI?

PF: Why do you think I'm a spy or work for the government?

SB: You're not saying your not.

PF: I'm not saying I am.

PF is offline.

5 Minutes later

SB: So that's why yellow makes me sad I think.

Clarisse: You know what makes me sad? YOU DO! Maybe we should chug on over to 'mambepambe land' where maybe we could find some self-confidence for you, ya jack wagon! Tissue? * throws tissue box across the room * Crybaby.

End

AN: Love that commercial. I'm gonna go eat now. I'll update more later. (I hope)

Believe in Me Tonight


	3. Chapter 3

AN: I'm back! Nico's name might have been confusing. It's just a 'D'. It doesn't mean anything. Just a random letter. But if you look at it, it's a frowning face. D: Just a fact. This is one of my favorite chapters. I'm homeschooled and go to a homeschooling group. One of my 'classes' was an acting class with my aunt. We came up with a lot of funny jokes that are considered inside jokes to this day. I just wanted to incorporate as many as those jokes as possible. Now to stop my rambling. Please read on.

3

Every one is online.

SB: HELP! SOMEBODY HELP!

WG: What?

SB: THE CHICKEN HOUSES EXPLODED!

Everyone: ?

WG: I know I'm going to regret this... How did the chicken houses explode?

SB: The Aliens!

Everyone: ?

I3Plants: Why exactly did they blow up the innocent chicken houses?

SB: For the pickles from the pickle storm!

Everyone: ?

OceanRox: Pickle Storm?

SB: Of course! How else do pickles rain?

NoItAll: Well, He's your son, Poseidon.

S1: I'm still stuck on the Aliens.

SB: The aliens attacked... today!

D: Okay, Percy. I called a friend of mine. He's a nice doctor. He's going to 'help' you.

SB: NO! No I've been through this before! Help! Help me! Ohhhhh Pretty Lights!

SB is offline.

End

AN: Wow I do a lot of author notes. Thanks for the reviews and the story alerts and the favorite lists. I really appreciate it. :)


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Sorry I didn't get to update yesterday.

Warning! Do not read if you hate Twilight bashing! This chapter bashes Twilight a lot!

You have been warned

Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson. Or Twilight. Or the actors in Twilight.

4

SB is online.

PF is online.

WG is online.

SB: So Annabeth...

PF: Uh-oh.

SB: Do you think I can stake Edward with Riptide?

WG: Why do you want to stake Edward?

SB: Cause I hate fairies.

PF: You know he's not a fairy... right?

SB: But he sparkles...

PF: He drinks blood!

SB: Not human blood.

WG: Wait a second. How do you two know so much about Twilight?

PF: I'm a teenage girl.

WG: Percy?

SB: Taylor's hot...

WG: …

PF: …

WG: Should I be concerned?

PF: …

WG: Percy, I think it's time to see the nice doctor again.

SB: NO! You'll never take me alive!

WG knocks SB out.

WG: I'll take you alive. Unconscious, but alive.

End.

AN: According to my best friend, I have a love hate relationship with Twilight. It's just so fun and easy to make fun of! Short chapter, I know.

Believe In Me Tonight.


	5. Chapter 5

AN :AHHH I'm sorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorry! I meant to update before, but between school, babysitting, and life, I ran out of time. Sorry! This one isn't one of my favorites, but it's okay. With luck, I'll update later today.

New:

Stormi: Zeus

Fred: Apollo

Ninja: Artemis

5

NoItAll: Poseidon, your son has problems.

OceanRox: He does not!

NoItAll: he wears Little Mermaid pajamas. He has problems.

Stormi: He gets it from his father.

Fred: OHHH BURN!

Ninja: Shut up.

Fred: Why is your name 'Ninja?'

Ninja: 'Cause I like ninjas.

Stormi: Ninjas?

Ninja: Yep. Better than 'Fred.'

Fred: DON'T KNOCK THE 'FRED'!

Ninja: * Sticks tongue out *

Fred: That it. You're going down!

Stomi: Now Children.

Fred: But Dad!

Ninja: But Dad!

Stormi: No 'buts!' Just chill.

Everyone: …

Stormi: What?

NoItAll: Father? You really don't need to say 'Chill.'

Stormi: Why not?

Everyone: …

OceanRox: How 'bout you take this one, Athy.

NoItAll: Don't call me Athy.

Fred: Who wants to hear a Haiku?

Everybody: NO!

Fred: But I've got a good one!

Everybody: NO!

Fred: Fine.

End

Believe In Me Tonight


	6. Chapter 6

AN: Ahhh I haven't updated again!

Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson. No matter how much I ask Santa.

Warning: Percy and Zeus nearly get into a catfight. Should be fun :)

6

SB: What if I could fly?

Stormi: Don't even think about it!

SB: Sorry.

PF: Why would you even what to fly?

Stormi: Because it's awesome.

SB: Not really.

Stormi: Yes really.

SB: No, not really.

Stormi: YES REALLY!

SB: Okay! It's … okay.

Stormi: Ha! I win!

NoItAll: Congratulations. You beat a 16-year-old with problems.

SB: I Don'T HavE ProBleMs!

I3Plants: First step to solving a problem is admitting you have one.

SB: Ah! I give up!

PF: All is well again.

End

AN: Yeah, it's short. I know. Not even one page. Blah. Well, I have to go see the doctor (eye not mental) and take a History test. ByE!

Believe in Me Tonight


	7. Chapter 7

An: Hey kids! Well, this is the end I think. Last chapter. Unless I suddenly get a lot of inspiration... this is it.

Disclaimer:I do not own Percy Jackson or Barney

7

SB: I have problems.

I3Plants: Finally you admit it!

SB: Yes, and I also love Barney. I love you, you love me...

PF: Err. You sure you're alright?

SB: Never better!

D: NICO! YOU'RE DEAD MEAT!

Everyone: ?

SB: I have no idea what you're talking about, _Nico. _

D: Dude, not cool.

PF: I'm lost.

SB: I'm Percy.

D: No, I'm Percy. Nico hacked me and I hacked him back.

SB: No no no no no no no no no. I'm Percy.

WG: Tell me something only Percy would know.

SB: Ummmmmmmm . Ni-Percy isn't here right now. Please leave a message after the beep. .

_SB is offline. _

D: Does this mean I'm Percy again?

WG: I... think so...

D: Good. I don't like being Nico.

I3Plants: I'm still confused...

End

AN : Yeah, it's short. Yeah, not my favorite. But that's all I got. Thanks to everyone for the awesome reviews and alerts. Cya!

Believe in me Tonight


	8. Author's Note Please Read

HEYYYYYY!

Just wanted to let everyone know that I'm about to upload the D.G.M. Sequel: D.G.M. Mobile.

Basically, it's the same thing as D.G.M. but everyone is texting and usually at school.

Please check it out!

Believe In Me Tonight


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